This online quiz is mostly for soldiers or cops, I think. But you can take it too. If you don't "go on missions", then substitute other situations, like sparring if you take martial arts, doing an eviction, leading people on a work crew, administering first aid, camping in bad weather, or having to confront someone who is being disruptive and angry and make them leave. I've had to do all of these at various times, with varying degrees of self-control. So I just substituted, and came up "passed muster". http://oripomerantz.com/toughness.html
This test was linked to here: http://www.warriorsciencegroup.com/warrior-mindset/
I've been poking around paramilitary/security professionals' training websites lately out of curiosity because of something I read the other day in a reply to one of my comments on the Survivalist Blog. Now, I might be wrong but it seems to me they've sprung up a bunch lately. Maybe it's only that I have just become aware of them, so I'm noticing them, kind of like those missing hubcaps I keep noticing.
Anyway, some of them have open enrollment and might be good places to learn how to shoot, but there are other organizations like Appleseed as well, that would probably be more economical. Learning how to drive defensively might save you from a carjacking. You can read about it in a book and then try bits of it yourself, just do so in a safe manner and use your brain. Martial arts training is always good, you really can't go wrong with that. I think it's the martial arts training that gives me any mental toughness that I might have. Marching band was also kind of good for that; when I was a teen we had to march for miles in the snow and all kinds of weather. Somehow the music made the foot-numbing slog go by without too much suffering.